"I Don't Want Dick Tonight......."

“……EAT MY PUSSY RIGHT” 

Oral Sex, Cunnilingus, Muff Diving, Going Down, Lip Service, Box Lunch, Lickity Slit….call it what ya will but it all boils down to one thing innit – Eating Pussy!

I will be the first one to fling two han’ inna di air and say I love it. Yet in big big 2010, it still remains a taboo with many males (I struggle to use the word “Men” lol) still maintaining they don’t do it (and a small set of women who say they don’t like/want it but they likely never had it so their ignorance is their bliss…..)

Why?! 

There are 2 types of orgasm a woman can have – Clitoral and Vaginal and a LOT of women can only orgasm through clitoral stimulation. Yet and still there are a multitude of men who are only interested in letting their snake (often read minute maggot) roam in the dark cave! {SELFISH BASTARDS!} Lest I forget those who’s idea of foreplay is sticking their crusty unmanicured hand into your precious well-tended garden and rummaging around like they’re digging in their toolbox!! Oh yeah and those who love for their mic to be rocked and neglect to deal with the fact the harmonica forms part of this band too!!!! {HYPOCRITES!!!!}

The “reasonings” I’ve heard:

“Eurgh, how do I know her pussys clean” – If a woman’s vajayjay isn’t clean why would you even contemplate sticking your dick in it let alone anything else?! An uncircumcised penis (massages temple) has more chance of being below par hygiene than a healthy vagina (note the use of healthy, ladies maintenance goes beyond your regular wax!) Dudes don’t forget to pull that skin back!!!

“Only man who’s dick aint up to par need to do that get me” – FOOL! As I mentioned before, 2 types of female orgasm. You could have a womb tickler for a dick but if you haven’t fully stimulated a woman or you have a woman who only orgasms clitorally you are NOT going to tip her over the edge. The smasher is these ones love receiving head, they love how it feels, love that stimulation and pleasurement… So why the floss would a woman not appreciate the same?!

“I aint doing that to some any chick that I aint married to” – Now whilst I agree people need to take some caution in whom they be getting oral with, this statement is shullbit! If you aint doing it before, you aint gonna do it after. And in the off chance you do, you’re likely not doing it because you want to, you’re now feeling obligated and head through obligation is not worth the wax job! Gahlang wid dat!

“Pussy Smells” – Healthy Vaj does NOT! If a woman has scent issues when she parts her legs, you need to not even stick ya dick in it either.

I can accept these musings from a juvenile who’s still sexually educating (but do not get it twisted, I’ve heard some young’uns are holding it down better than some of you grown oafs) but when I hear these things coming from big men I’m shocked and pretty much disgusted! 

Having embarked on a period of abstinence I recently had my ability to have a reactivated sex life where this was excluded questioned…. LOL! I’ve had relationships without it before don’t get it twisted but when you upgrade from Boys To Men (no offence but you may well be a man who handles his own in various areas and aspects of his life but sexually, hey you can STILL be a boy!!!)

A woman that truly knows her body, knows what feels good and through experience knows what heightens her good feeling. When you take charge of your own orgasm and make it clear to your bed mate what’s working, what’s not and what you want you reach a heightened more fulfilling sexual plane. I’m sure the sexually liberated ladies can agree with me!

To conclude I leave you with the wise words of The Queen B Lil Kim “The moral of the story is this, You aint lickin’ this, You aint stickin this”

I’m Out!!!